While I’m waiting…

A couple of months ago, I went to the butchery to buy a quarter kg of beef so that I could prepare my supper. I live alone, so I only buy what is sufficient for my consumption. So here I was, waiting patiently for my turn to arrive so that I could place my order. Once I did, the butcher man asked me in Kiswahili, “Kwanini unanunua nyama kidogo hivi? Mzee atashiba hii kweli?” which means, “Why are you purchasing this little amount of meat? Will your husband really get full?”

I remember feeling an immediate rush of emotions. I was instantly mad, confused and offended by his assumptions, yet he went on. “Unajua kama mama wa nyumba, unafaa kupikia mzee nyama ya kutosha na watoto pia ndio washibe vizuri.” meaning “As the woman of the house, you need to cook enough meat for your husband as well as for your children so that they are all well fed”.

I think a lot. I tend to analyze statements and turn them in every possible angle in order to get a clear picture of anything I am told. In that short moment, I had already come up with five deductions on his motive.

1. He assumed I was married and should carry out my ‘wife duties’ accordingly.

2. This was his new business idea to increase the amount of meat he sells on a daily.

3. He wanted to find out my marital status and wanted to ‘try his luck’.

4. If at all I wasn’t married, do I have children?

5. He simply has the worst choice of topics for small talk.

I smiled, calmly looked at him and told him that I am single. Consequently, he told me how he was also single and would not mind coming over to my house so that I could cook for him and we could take things to the next level. I was so amazed at his ignorance; the nerve, the audacity! My 3rd deduction proved to be correct. I am normally completely numb to these things. A woman, especially one frequenting Nairobi town, builds her own thick skin to ignore the catcalls and disrespectful utterances made by random men. This situation, however, proved to be much different than the usual. You see, this one touched a very sensitive part.

I have reached the age where my friends are getting married and for some reason, the number of comments by people who assume I should be married with kids increases daily. Society has some sort of ‘standard pattern’ and the people bound to this system believe that everyone should follow the set timelines of certain significant events in life. In other words, you should have graduated school, getting married and having kids, working and earning lots of money by a certain age, etc. Yet believers are not to conform to the patterns of the world. The may not all be wrong, but they should all follow God’s perfect will and timing. Romans 12:2 NLT says;

Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, and let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.

Lately, talks about depression and mental illnesses are becoming extremely popular and solutions are given that only last a moment. In my opinion, depression issues stem from comparisons and trying to comply with set standards and timelines which most people adhere to; even when it’s not in line with God’s perfect will. Yet here we are, struggling to follow in line with the rest in the system as we become more empty within.

I occasionally listen to Amani Aila’s show on Hope FM 93.3 called ‘Shangilia’, an educative show which based on the content; mainly targets married people. In some shows, he has engaged married people on their experiences with their spouses on different issues. While a good number of people celebrate their marriages and their spouses, a good number also calls in to shame their spouses and even talk about how they want to give up. How their spouses are sexually involved with other people and how love has completely left their unions. This really broke my heart. I am not an expert in marriage, but I do know that God designed and instituted marriage for his glory. Our relationship with Christ has been directly likened to the matrimonial covenant between a man and woman, which clearly shows the place of marriage in the eyes and heart of God.

While listening to the concerns of some of the people who call in during the show, one underlying concern that takes center stage in all the situations is the fact that most of them do not find their completion in Christ. Colossians 2:10 states,

 10. And you have been made complete in Christ, who is the head over every ruler and authority.

We are made complete in Christ yet most people do not live in this reality. Our completion, joy, and fullness come when we are in Christ. All other issues stem from the fact that he is not our focus, our joy, and strength. I learnt this the hard way when I was involved in relationships and friendships which I believed would complete me and make me feel wanted yet I was empty and lost within.

One woman actually called in during the show to mention how she regrets getting married quickly since she does not have any joy at all even after waiting to have sex when married. My heart really went out to her. This, to me, was a perfect example of someone who thought that marriage would complete her only for her to experience disappointment. Many people say that single people rush to get married while the married rush to get out of it. As horrible and humorously dark as it may sound, the reality is all around us.

God has strategically placed some amazing couples doing marriage God’s way in my life as examples and mentors i.e. my parents, my pastor and his wife just to mention a few. The kind of marriages that minister to people and even point people to Christ, and that’s how it should be. While the focus of this particular post has been marriage, completion in Christ affects literally all areas of our lives. I think it is important for me to mention that I never understood what being complete in Christ meant. I was born and raised in a Christian home yet only knew how to carry out my salvation recently. I felt like I had to work so hard to get God’s attention which made my quiet times quite few. As I have grown, here are some things I learnt and understood which I believe can be helpful and beneficial to you too.

  1. God loves you and is very intentional with you. He wants you all for himself and literally wants to spend every single moment of your day with you.
  2. Our relationship with God requires intentionality and constant communication. Just like any other relationship, communication is key. Read the word of God, talk and listen to God in prayer and be yielded to his instruction and leading.
  3. Desire and long for God’s presence and never be in a hurry to leave .
  4. REST – This was the most liberating for me. I had to intentionally be content with knowing that God wants the very best for me and that it is not my job to figure it all out. Keep off distractions and know that God makes everything beautiful in its time. God’s got you!

After all is said and done:

While you are waiting for whatever door is next, go deeper in knowing Christ and being complete in Him.

There is always a deeper level.

BTW, I model bridal gowns for an amazing woman called Anne Njue. If you have a wedding coming up, be sure to reach out to her on her Facebook page for a lovely gown. Here is one of them. 🙂

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this post. Please share it with your family and friends as well. Stay blessed and stay happy always.

Gown by: Liana Bridal House

Make up: Simple Everyday Makeup By Ythera

Photographer: Kaymoney Photography

Studio: Metz Photolab

 

With Love,

Mumbua 🙂

 

 

43 Comments

Join the discussion and tell us your opinion.

Hizareply
October 10, 2018 at 09:10 PM

Wonderful content.. God Time is the best and everyone is unique and wonderfully made just be you

Sarah Kimeureply
October 10, 2018 at 10:10 PM
– In reply to: Hiza

For sure, thank you so much for taking the time to read Hiza

Kambuareply
October 10, 2018 at 09:10 PM

Such a good read…

Sarah Kimeureply
October 10, 2018 at 10:10 PM
– In reply to: Kambua

Kambua, thank you so much for reading. This means a lot

Paulreply
October 10, 2018 at 10:10 PM

Wow!!! This is lovely Sarah… Hapoo Sasa… Nyama… Kakwota….hehee… Interesting article…. I love it… You are not alone… I have also been told the same by “sister mboga”…and many shopkeepers…..anyway, lets continue waiting on God…. But also let’s not forget that God might also be waiting on Us…… All in all, more love…☺Keep up with the encouraging blogs….

Sarah Kimeureply
October 10, 2018 at 10:10 PM
– In reply to: Paul

This is so encouraging Paul. Asante sana. Thank you for sharing your experience as well and even taking the time to read. Barikiwa sana!

Estherreply
October 10, 2018 at 10:10 PM

God’s timing is the best.It brings great fulfillment.Inspirational

Sarah Kimeureply
October 10, 2018 at 10:10 PM
– In reply to: Esther

Kabisa dear. Thank you for always reading my posts and even commenting. I see you girl. God bless 🙂

Annereply
October 10, 2018 at 10:10 PM

This has made my night…hehehe the intro was funny….I love the article, keep up the good work.

Sarah Kimeureply
October 10, 2018 at 10:10 PM
– In reply to: Anne

Nakwambia mtu anapitia mambo. Hahahah! Thank you so much for reading. It means a lot!

Rachelreply
October 10, 2018 at 11:10 PM

I love… So profound 💯

Sarah Kimeureply
October 11, 2018 at 12:10 PM
– In reply to: Rachel

Thank you so much for reading Rachel.

sylviareply
October 10, 2018 at 11:10 PM

pretty good content mumbua

Sarah Kimeureply
October 11, 2018 at 12:10 PM
– In reply to: sylvia

Sylvia thank you so much for taking the time. It means so much.

Lilianreply
October 11, 2018 at 06:10 AM

And yet for the longest time other peoples opinion and comments had gotten into me not forgetting the comparison brought mainly by the ‘society standards’ I felt I had rushed and married early, had kids early and all….well I am a true testimony that Gods time is the best there ever could be. I am more content and complete in him and consequently my marriage and family couldn’t be better. There is nothing like too early or too late, its all about Gods timing.

Sarah Kimeureply
October 11, 2018 at 12:10 PM
– In reply to: Lilian

Wow Lilian. I am so glad you took the time to read. I experienced the same thing but realized this. You are blessed dear. Shine on!

Sarah Kimeureply
October 11, 2018 at 12:10 PM
– In reply to: Lilian

You are absolutely right about all this. Thank you so much for sharing. One day you should share your story and journey on this blog. I’d be more than happy to share. 😊

Kelireply
October 11, 2018 at 07:10 AM

Awesome content,thankful for sharing these eye opening divine insights.

Sarah Kimeureply
October 11, 2018 at 12:10 PM
– In reply to: Keli

Thank you so much for reading and for the kind words Keli.

Lewisreply
October 11, 2018 at 09:10 AM

Great read!!

Sarah Kimeureply
October 11, 2018 at 12:10 PM
– In reply to: Lewis

Thank you for reading Lewis

Chebet Makenareply
October 11, 2018 at 10:10 AM

Oh I just discovered a gem, your blog! This is such a gentle and very timely read for me. Now to binge read all other posts

Sarah Kimeureply
October 11, 2018 at 12:10 PM
– In reply to: Chebet Makena

Wow Chebet! This has really touched my heart. You are so awesome. Thank you so much for the uplifting words.

Betty Mwangireply
October 11, 2018 at 02:10 PM

First of all,finally this is here haha! I am proud of you…

I would like to thank Lilian for putting that statement that it’s never too late or too early but God’s timing is the best…i may have heard it many times before but it has shed a different light today… Thank you

My babe this is great! It’s interesting to read a conversation that we’ve been having and not only that but living it too. I like the authenticity in your blogs, they are actually testimonies,now that I have come to know you better, about your life and walk with God,your relationship with the Father! This blog right here is truth in every way… Being complete in Christ is true identity…We look to Jesus as the standard and not the world.

Keep on! ♥

Sarah Kimeureply
October 11, 2018 at 10:10 PM
– In reply to: Betty Mwangi

Awwwww…. Betty I always know I have you cheering me on. We really have been talking about these things. It’s so amazing how so many people could relate. Jesus is the standard. Thank you so much for reading and even blessing me with your sweet words. Barikiwa babe.

Stephen Wanyoikereply
October 11, 2018 at 03:10 PM

I have really enjoyed the read. It’s amazing that God really wants us to know that we are complete in Him. We should never look for satisfaction in people because it’s temporal. The only satisfaction that is eternal is in Christ Jesus.
Nice read.

Sarah Kimeureply
October 11, 2018 at 10:10 PM
– In reply to: Stephen Wanyoike

Thank you for reading this Steve. It means a lot. And all you have mentioned is absolute truth. Thank you for sharing

Joyannereply
October 11, 2018 at 03:10 PM

Wow Sara, what a nice piece! So interesting and honest. For sure we should be made complete in God, and stop comparing ourselves to others.

Sarah Kimeureply
October 11, 2018 at 10:10 PM
– In reply to: Joyanne

You are absolutely right about this. Thank you so much for taking the time to read dearie.

Benjamin Njathareply
October 11, 2018 at 04:10 PM

This is an awesome piece. You are such an inspiration to many and a challenge to me as an author

Sarah Kimeureply
October 11, 2018 at 10:10 PM
– In reply to: Benjamin Njatha

Wow wow wow! You are so loyal! It is people like you who give me the motivation to soldier on. Thank you so much for taking the time to read and even comment. You are awesome. Barikiwa tena sana.

Philipreply
October 11, 2018 at 09:10 PM

Waooo That’s lovely

Philipreply
October 11, 2018 at 10:10 PM

Waooo That’s a Lovely piece

Sarah Kimeureply
October 11, 2018 at 10:10 PM
– In reply to: Philip

Wow… the fact that you took the time to read and comment really means a lot to me. Thank you so much Philip.

Annreply
October 13, 2018 at 08:10 AM

Great long read. Very encouraging to hear someone echo my experiences. You have articulated it well. Its not easy when the society’s expectations aren’t met, but God gives the grace in all situations.

Sarah Kimeureply
October 16, 2018 at 07:10 PM
– In reply to: Ann

This is so awesome. Thank you so much for taking the time to read. I am happy you could relate with it

Joyreply
October 15, 2018 at 08:10 AM

Wow i would be totally selfish and inconsiderate to not comment on this, its awesome piece of advice,….I love thw blog, Waiting upon God..

Sarah Kimeureply
October 16, 2018 at 07:10 PM
– In reply to: Joy

Wow.. This is so wonderful Joy. Thank you so much for reading

Laurencereply
October 16, 2018 at 03:10 PM

Good read 👌

Sarah Kimeureply
October 16, 2018 at 07:10 PM
– In reply to: Laurence

Thank you Laurence

Sabina chombareply
October 17, 2018 at 06:10 PM

I have reached a point that I want to be rude to those nosy questions. They really don’t know what we have seen in the soo called serious relationships. Happiness is key. Thanks Sarah for that inspiring message. As am still waiting am going deep in spirit.

Sarah Kimeureply
November 04, 2018 at 03:11 PM
– In reply to: Sabina chomba

This is so beautiful Sabina. Thank you so much for commenting. Let’s keep on in this journey. 🙂

Alex Kamaureply
October 19, 2018 at 12:10 AM

Thank you Sarah, profound always. Being complete in Christ is the way of happiness. I love your no 5 assumption. God bless you

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